Think Flaws Tuesday: Getting Challenging Things Done Examples
Example 1: How I used to think for goals that are pretty straight forward and where the path to achieving them can be known with certainty. Goal: Loosing weight.
Step 1: Define the goal. → Loosing weight.
Step 2: What do I need to do to achieve the goal? → Train more, eat less.
Step 3: Do the things that are needed to achieve the goal. → Try to do a lot of sports and eat way less.
Step 4: Achieve the goal. → Lost weight.
By thinking this way about loosing weight, we end up having a rough time keeping up the eating less and train more and most likely do too much too early and too intensely. Nevertheless, this way of thinking for this goal still works for some people. Let’s see how that could change in the second example.
Example 2: How I’m thinking now for goals that are pretty straight forward and where the path to achieving them can be known with certainty. Goal: Loosing weight.
Step 1: Define the goal. → Loosing weight.
Step 2: How do I achieve the goal? → I will loose some weight every time my energy output is superior to my energy intake. It only needs to be one unit more.
Step 3: Hypothetical: What do I need to do to achieve the goal? I don’t need lot of sports or eat way less. I just need to add one 30 min walking session everyday and instead of eating the cookies in the evening I will eat apples with peanut-butter.
Step 4: Do the things that are needed to achieve the goal. I will do my 30min walk and eat my apples and peanut-butter every evening. Everything else can stay the same. I also track my weight over time, to see whether my hypothetical works for me.
Step 5: Constantly re-evaluate and refine Step 3 and change Step 4 accordingly. By tracking my weight over time I can see whether I lost weight or not. I can also factor in how I’ve been feeling and whether I’m happy with the results. This re-evaluation gives me the chance to change my answer to Step 3 and accordingly change Step 4.
Step 6: Achieve the goal. Lost weight.
Using this approach for straight forward goals, makes it more likely to achieve them and sustain the results over time.
Example 3: How I used to think for goals that are more situation and case specific, and the path for achieving them can’t be known with certainty in advance. Goal: Being a better boyfriend.
Step 1: Define the goal. Being a better boyfriend.
Step 2: What do I need to do to achieve the goal? I need to be the best version of myself and bring that better me into the relationship.
Step 3: Do the things that are needed to achieve the goal. Identify the things that I could improve on and improve them. Maybe ask my girlfriend what she doesn’t like about me or things I could do better and change these things too. Do these things until I’ve become a better boyfriend.
Step 4: Achieve the goal. I’m a better boyfriend.
This approach is doomed to fail. Failing to define what this state of “being a better boyfriend” actually means leads us on the wrong path right from the beginning of the thinking process.
Example 4: How I’m thinking now for goals that are more situation and case specific, and the path for achieving them can’t be known with certainty in advance. Goal: Being a better boyfriend.
Step 1: Define the goal. Being a better boyfriend.
Step 2: How do I achieve the goal? I’m not my own boyfriend, I’m her boyfriend. Being a better boyfriend means that my girlfriend perceives me as being a better version of who I used to be before the change.
Step 3: Hypothetical: What do I need to do to achieve the goal? Understand how my girlfriend perceives me. Understand why she isn’t happy with the boyfriend she has got. Understand whether I’m willing to make these changes and whether I believe it’s worth it etc etc.
Step 4: Do the things that are needed to achieve the goal. I make a big effort and listen to her and genuinely try understand what she means and what makes her unhappy. Take her feedback and execute on the things I have identified and decided to change.
Step 5: Constantly re-evaluate and refine Step 3 and change Step 4 accordingly. See whether the changes I’ve made have changed her perception about the boyfriend she has got. If necessary re-evaluate my answer to Step 3 and accordingly change Step 4.
Step 6: Achieve the goal. I’m a better boyfriend.
Here, the importance of Step 2 really shines through. It allows for a complete reframing of what the state of achievement of the goal actually is.
Changing the thinking process in pursuing goals has helped me immensely in getting challenging things done. I hope it can help you too.